Doctors, Guitar Judges, and a whole lot of Nervousness!

Recently I just found out that I have to play two songs in front of a judge, just him/her and me, and if you know me, I know that I have very high standards for myself. The first time I did festival, I didn't get the highest score, so when I got out of the room with the judge, I cried. I'm a wuss. Yes. I hate the truth but it's not like it's not unheard of. I'm a girl, and that's all I can get out of why I cry so easily. Last time when I did festival, I barely got the highest score by 1 point, and even then I felt like I cheated and I STILL cried. Heaven only knows how I'm going to respong to this festival. My hands are sore from playing all the time and my nerves are shot. Braces are driving me crazy and I have these stupid rashes all over my body. Thanks immune system, all I needed was weird gross red things all over my body to stress me out even more!! I'm also stressed because I don't have my old doctor anymore, we switched doctors. I was said to find out, I have had Dr. Wayment since I was soo little, I remember going into his waiting room, scowling because of my sore throat and that there was country music playing, the nurse opening the door and calling out, "Natalie Christensen?" Walking nervously into the room and waiting for the doctor, looking at the popsicle sticks and looking at models or the inside of the ear and posters. The man who has nursed me back to health all those years, POOP! No longer. Instead this weirdo sad looking doctor walks in the room and I would of been not so happy if it werent for the fact that he had the knowledge to cure me. He always repeated himself and he didn't laugh or smile once. Euk, no way. Anyone seen Patch Adams? Now THAT'S the kind of doctor I want. Someone to make me feel like everything is going to be A-OK for a while. I could sure use that now. I tell you what, it's hard being a teenager and being responsible. I'm nervous for school, my health, the guitar fesitval, my doctors, everything I suppose. I just hope that when I get older, I won't be able to cry as easily.