It was a cloudy, yet warm day. It was the middle of August, the beggining of School at Canyon Keep High School. I was walking against the dull wall of bricks, worn out from students throwing balls at them and graffiti. (get some more options on this part.) Dylan Brown and Conner Beck, a couple of students from the school were walking past me talking about guns. I was those kind of girls were I was a tomboy. You know, most friends are guys, not girls. I walked up to them evesdropping, yet right by their sides. "Yeah I love those (a type of gun we need to discuss)! They are so freaking fun to shoot. Hey remember when you hit that pheasant with the (gun we need to discuss)? I still can`t believe you. I wan`t to see the pheasant myself!" Dylan said.(maybe a synonym for that?) Conner laughed a guilty laugh. I knew that smile anywhere from him. That ment he had actually lied. Haha, once Dylan found out he lied, He was going to poke him on his pressure point in his neck. Dylan was tall and muscular, a blondish brown, with glasses and blue (not sure if the real Dylan is blue or brown.) eyes. He was a joker in class and almost always annoyed someone. You usually had to say something insulting to him to shut up and get to his seat and start working. Conner was normal heigth( not for sure how to spell that!) for a sophmore and had blonde hair with blue eyes and annoying just as Dylan. "Sorry, I uhh... ate it!" Conner said with a scent of making that fake sentence. I rolled my eyes, laughed a silent laughed, then walked somewhere else. I saw Dimitri House. He has had a big crush on me ever since Kindergarten. He was really tall, probably the tallest in the school, blue eyes and blonde hair. He saw me and of course, came causualy (spell) walking over with his best friend, Troy, and of course he was going to try flirting with me. "Hey Sonic, how are you?" He causuly (check on spelling) pronounced. I thought this was way too corny. No, I never really did like him, but he was handsome in his own way once in every blue moon. "FIne, Fine. And you?" I had a friend one year older then me. He was a senior (is that how the high school system works?) and an awesome friend. Once when I sat by Dimitri in lunch, one of my friends came over and remarked to Dimitri that Jesse liked me and that I liked Jesse. No way it was true, but when I faced my head down, I looked at Dimitri`s hand, and his hand looked like his knuckles were about to explode with pressure. They were as white as pure snow. I finally nudged her off and she left. Ever since then, he would always leave or back off if I meantioned (spell) Jesse. "Hey, by the way have you seen Jesse?" I asked purplexed. (check) The flirtasious smile off of Dimitri`s face had vanished and he jerked this thumb over his back and said grimly, "He`s over playing football" I never really ment to not did I ever go to see Jesse. He was just a good escape plan and he was a good friend too. I walked out to the fields on a high hill and looked for Dessiree and Amanda ( I might put Ally if we become friends before this is published.) I wanted to tell them about the good news about me getting a job for vet assistant. That is my dream job. Not being a vet assistant but actually being a vet. I love animals and have grown up with 3 of them. All dogs and all rowdy and wild! That`s part of what makes me sort of like a tomboy. I finally caught sight of Dessiree and sprinted as fast as I could toward her.
OK folks well I`m gettin sleepy and satisfied, I`ll work on it later. Bye.
and please remark on the check spelling and look for synonyms that you think might help. I really do need your help and love all of you! Bye!
ReplyDeleteThat sounds like a really good book Natalie. You are a good writer. If I were you I would definitely do some spell checking and proof reading. I would copy and paste that and transfer it over to Microsoft Word, from there you can edit it a lot better than. Word will put the red squiggly lines under misspelled words. As for synonyms, in Word, type in a word (ex: pretty) and if you right click on the work it will ask for synonyms, then Word will give you different answers (ex: pretty, words: beautiful, elegant), or you can get a thesaurus and that will help you, but the computer will be easier than looking all that up. I hope that helps.
ReplyDeletekk I`ll do that!
ReplyDelete